HomeCandidHappy International women’s day; Celebrating the She word!
March 8, 2020
Happy International women’s day; Celebrating the She word!
I am a woman and I’m proud to be one. To be sincere, I never thought much about being a girl let alone a woman. It was normal. It was the body I grew up in it was as natural as breathing in and out. But then I met Mr. World. I got introduced to a society that made me think twice. A world that made me think that being a woman was sort of a mistake, a sign of weakness and worst out of all of them, something that was worth less.
Confused? Of course I was. I didn’t know how to process this kind of information especially at such a young age. Back track to the first time I got my period, it felt like a sin. Something that I had to hide not to protect my pride as a woman but to hide my shame for being one…
“Stay away from boys now they’ll get you pregnant and leave you! Their lives will move on and yours will be ruined forever.”
“You’re no longer a baby!”
“The pain is normal. You just need to suck it up, go about your day and you’ll just be fine.”
All these misguided information I’m sure damaged a little part of any woman who was forced to face them and unlearning them has been more painful but has ended up bringing out the best kind of peace, and better understanding that has helped me, and any woman who has overcome these misconception break the toxic cycle.
A woman’s cycle is a blessing. It is a small introduction to the possibility of carrying life in the future and apart from that, I consider it a sign of strength because bleeding for four plus days without dying is kind of bad ass if you ask me.
Moving on to the future, life gets weird and complicated for this she wolf:
Feminism is a misunderstood term: Heck fresh into my twenties, I had the wrong idea about what feminism was. I thought it was a campaign against all men. ‘Men are trash. Men are dogs.’ You know that sort of bile. I also thought it was all about women who didn’t need a man at any point and considered hem obsolete. But now I’ve lived long enough to realize that feminism is all about fighting for equality between both genders. Equality doesn’t mean oppression of the other for one to rise. It’s all about respect and support of one another.
It’s not a lie we’ve been oppressed by society for the longest time. I respect the fact that women who came before me fought hard for me to enjoy the freedom I have today. I have the opportunity. To choose my path, express myself through my art, not allow my existence be defined by any by a man and most important, I have control. I feel free and I have the opportunity to use my freedom to clear a path for those who will come after me.
We’re still fighting for equal pay. We’re still fighting for more sits at the table or rather, bring our own a table.
We’ve been raised to see each other as competition. As enemies, we’re pinned against each other from the beginning: From education, career and even in relationships. Battle lines are always drawn. Why? I have no fucking clue Look at what happened between Nicki Minaj and Cardi B, great artists but the music industry can only allow only one reigning Queen. Complete bullshit… I have found myself there and once I realized how foolish I felt, I vowed to right that wrong. Support your sisters. Support each other. There’s enough room for everyone.
Power Dynamics in relationships
“Don’t dream too much honey, you might scare him off. He might be a little bit intimidated by your ambition.
“If you earn more than he does, he might feel the pressure and leave. A man is a provider, a protector. What happens when you take that away from him?
“I don’t know Auntie Sheryl. I’m I not supposed to have my own dreams? I’m not supposed to be ambitious and actually build a life that I want to live? Why does the man have to have everything? Where was it written that I have to bow down and become so little to allow him grow? If he is man enough, he should be able to understand the fact that I am my own person. I have my goals and that has nothing to do with him.”
“If I’m married or in a serious relationship, he should consider it a partnership and partners are there to support each other in whatever the other needs. And for that to happen, respect has to reign. I going for my dreams or earning more than he does, doesn’t mean he is any less of a man. It shouldn’t mean I don’t respect him.
“I mean, which man doesn’t love free money? A dumb one! So Aunty, it’s all about perception and finding the right one for you even if it takes forever.” Ali Wong Netflix
“All in all I’m proud to be a woman. I’m proud to be a girl, a daughter, a sister and hopefully one day, a wife. I thank God I’m surrounded by strong, ambitious, kind hearted, supportive women who have helped me grow and seeing me and watching them win just gives me a special kind of joy. “
Generally, women are winning. All around women are breaking barriers, breaking the glass ceilings and showing the world who’s boss. Despite everything that is placed before us we still win!
We are truly special beings and in order for the world to hear us. We need to love ourselves each other and support us
I would go on and on or actually write a book! But I’m sure ya’ll get the gist!