Make or Break

…Taking a walk alone most times is not done when one is OK. We normally do it so as to clear our burdened hearts and troubled souls…it helps us think…come up with better solutions to problems and in some cases, it brings us peace and a sense of calm.

…I took a walk a few days ago just to give myself a minute to clear my thoughts because I knew it wouldn’t be easy coming up with the next piece. Writing in itself, has never been easy… Keeping your audience with you and trying to paint them a picture of your world requires a special kind of skill, touch…inspiration and an eye.  Deep down, I hoped this walk would help with that.

As I continue ‘my journey of share’ I think it’s time I established how I began my journey even without quite realizing I was doing it. The start of 2012 sealed the deal for me. I received my K.C.S.E Examination results and much to my disappointment, they were not as good as I’d I’ve wanted them to be. So trying to purse what I wanted seemed more like a fairy tale and coming from a family where K.C.S.E results were met with a lot of celebrations, all I wanted to do is crawl under a rock and just stay there.

I felt lost, confused and frustrated but up to this day, I thank God for my ever strong mum who never gave up on me and like my own personal super hero, she swooped in to save the day…She knew what I was passionate about and immediately went round looking for an institution that would best suit what I wanted to do and that’s where I met my 1st stepping stone.

…Nazarene was where I would lay my foundation. I remember  vividly…the first time I got to sit down in class and knowing that I finally made it…I felt like a multi bet winner from Sportpesa and nothing…and I mean nothing… could beat the sense of accomplishment I carried in my heart. For the 1st time in a really long time…I felt power, accomplishment and a winner in a field I always received a lot of backlash and nasty experiences.

There was no turning back now, I was a new me and I gave it my all…

Fast forward to my third year where practical classes got a bit intense I realized that as much as I wanted to go in front of the screen, I couldn’t, it wasn’t my strong suit but as time went by, I realized I was good…actually better than I expected behind the scenes, idea wise, with the camera, directing, editing, and even making sure everything went as planned when production took place. With this in mind, I made sure to work on it completely. Whatever I chose to do, I went for it!

…I chose to be a leader in my own right by carrying everyone on my back when faced with school projects.  I can recall the first time I was faced with editing a certain assignment and honestly, I really didn’t want to do it. The task seemed so boring and stale because I was used to exploring with my camera in hand, not sitting in the same spot for hours to get the job done.

… Well, fortunately or unfortunately no one else would do it. They didn’t know how to and they were clearly uninterested. So, I slowly pulled up a chair, opened the editing software and right beside it, a beginners editing tutorial on You Tube. And with that, everything just fell into place.

With every new skill I learned, and the small accomplishments I made, I got really good and even exceeded my expectations when a small exercise in class received recognition by a professional editor from a well-known media house in Kenya. I honestly felt as if I had) won an Oscar…! I was my own personal hero that day.

…those small accomplishments have really built me up to the person I am today and have proved that nothing is impossible…taking a leap of faith, trying, failing, getting frustrated, backlash…crying, almost giving up… these are some of the things that make the person you see each and every time we look into the mirror…you either work past them or let them consume you and turn you into your own worst enemy.

 #marykenya

#marykenya 

 

 

 

 

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